HOW TO GET OVER A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP?

Ever felt you cannot get over a broken relationship?

Here are the tips to get over him or her:

1.       List good things about yourself:

The first thing that you should do after a breakup is to feel good about yourself. Even if she broke up and told your bad things about yourself make her the bad person for a while in your thoughts and really believe that it’s not you, it’s she. This way you will think about yourself in a good way and that’s the first step to get over your ex partner. Reality is that when you go through a breakup, if you really loved the other person, you can’t think of anything bad about her and you only blame yourself. This ultimately leads to depression and stress which is not good for your health. This is why always make a list about your good habits that you like and read it couple of times each day.

2.       Have some fantasies:

If someone asks you not to think about your ex, it’s not going to work with you especially if you two have a long intimate relationship. If you want to think about the moments you shared with her or the happy days you spend together, its okay and you should do it. There is no possible way that could keep you from thinking about her and if it’s not possible, then you should think about her and get it over with.

3.       Help others:

If you think that you are the one that has the most pain and sadness in the world, try looking around you and you will find many people going through the same process of stress and depression. If you think you can’t help yourself from thinking about your ex, it’s better to leave your apartment and go find those who want your help and who really have no one to talk to in their life. There are pretty good chances that you will forget about your sorrows for a while and if it really happens, it’s very good improvement to get over your breakup.

4.       Make a list about your ex:

This is really helpful if you are really trying to forget her by any way possible. Start making a list about the good and bad thing of your ex. Trying thinking about the whole time you two were together and them think about the habits she has either bad or good. Put each kind of habits in separate columns and then see if bad things about her are more than the good things or not. This way you can easily realize that was she good for you or its better that you are separated.

5.       Follow your regular routine:

It seems like a difficult thing to follow a regular routine once you are separate from someone who was with you for a really long time but you have to do this. You can’t quit your job or sit all day on your couch avoiding your friends and family members. You have to get up every morning and go to your work. Remember if you are not feeling anything good about yourself, people will only laugh at you and make fun of you. No one really cares about what you think or how sad you are in your life.

6.       Talk to your friends:

Friends are really important in our lives and these are the ones that really help us in this kind of situation. If you have recently broke up with your partner, try talking to your friends and let them spend more time with you. This way you can forget about your sorrows for a while and you can have some good times and share some laughs with them. If you want to talk to your friend about the good times you had with your ex, do it. It’s not bad and part of the grieving process.

7.       Provide yourself some time and space:

Never try or force yourself to get over your ex over a night but give yourself some room and eventually you will feel good about your life. There is no way you can get over someone you loved for a really long time over a couple of days no matter how hard you try. So why should you do that? There is nothing good going to come out of it. Try giving yourself some time and just wait for the tight moment to finally say good bye to all of your past and memories about your ex.

THINGS TO AVOID IN A RELATIONSHIP

1.       Trying to make your partner better or improved:

Keep in mind that no one is perfect in the world and each person has their own setbacks and flaws and if you really love someone, you should accept them with their personalities. Yes there are some things or acts that could annoy you for a while but you should understand that you also have some of these habits that make your partner mad or annoyed. Unless you think you can’t live with the habits, you shouldn’t try changing or improving your spouse or remind her that she has a bad personality and she should changer herself in order to become a better person.

2.       Don’t criticize your partner:

Discussing something in a fun way is something else and criticizing in harsh words is something completely different. You should know that if you criticize someone, it won’t make them a better person but you will make them depressing and there are pretty good chances that they could get sick due to the stress that you are giving them with your words and criticism.

3.       Constant public display of affection:

You may think that it’s kind of romantic to kiss your partner in public or hold her hands while walking in the supermarket but there are limits to it. Yes it sounds very romantic and touching that you can’t keep your hands off of her but this is something that annoys people and more importantly, there are good chances that she would like it for a while but if you constantly keep on doing this kind of affection in public, you will make her mad or even lose her forever.

4.       Don’t engage in a fight in public:

If you are having some issues or problems with your partner, you both should sit quietly and alone and sort out your problems. There is nothing good could happen if you argue in public or think if you yell at her in front of people, you will prove your point. Always make sure not to involve anyone in your fights and clashes not even your parents or step parents. This is your life and you should be the one handling your problems. Don’t let anyone else interrupt you or make any statement unless you want them to.

5.       Always talk it out:

If you have something to tell to your spouse or if you think she has something that she could have told you’re a long time ago but she kept it secret, there is no need to keep these feelings or anger in your heart and you should take it out. It doesn’t mean you should yell at her or slap her but you should tell her what you think and then ask her what she has to say about this. Probably she has some genuine explanation to her actions and there are chances that she will provide you a solid reason for each of her act. Remember there is nothing more killing than keeping quit not talking at all for a relationship.

6.       Always forgive the mistakes:

Remember we all are human and because of that, we all have the right to make bad decision or make mistakes. It doesn’t make us any less of a human or a bad person but it’s just nature of humans that they usually learn from their mistakes. If your partner has done something bad and now that he has realized his mistake, you should forgive him with your heart. And by forgiving, it doesn’t mean that you just say it with words and still has some anger in your heart. Take as much time you want and get all the anger out. Tell your partner that he shouldn’t have made this mistake and you are really hurt with his actions. This way when finally he will apologize, you will forgive him because now you have told everything you needed to.

7.       Being jealous:

People say having a small amount of jealousy in a relationship is a good thing. This reminds the other person that there is someone who is afraid of losing him and he doesn’t want him to talk to anyone else besides him. But make sure that you stay in your limits. You don’t have any right to forbid your partner seeing his colleagues or females friends. He probably has longer relationship with them as compared to you and you shouldn’t put him in a position which is not likely for both of you.

TIPS TO AVOID BREAKING UP A RELATIONSHIP

1.       Prioritize your relationship:

There is nothing more important than the love of your life. Keep in mind that your friends will leave you in a bad situation but it will only be your partner who will stand besides you no matter how hard the situation is and how bad the conditions are. This is why you should make your love the number one priority of your life. You do not only do this with the words but make them realize that they are the only important thing in your whole life.

2.       Develop mutual interests:

There will be some things that you like but your partner doesn’t and there will also be some things that you don’t like but your partner does. It’s all about making a little compromise with the situation. No one is perfect in the world and each one has their own personality and interests. There are chances that your partner will have some habits that you won’t like and in the same manner, you will have some habits that your partner won’t like. Try taking part in her habits and interests and keep in mind that if you do that, you won’t have to ask her to take interest in your hobbies but she will automatically like your habits after a while.

3.       Talk about your relationship:

Telling your partner good things about her is one thing but talking about her good things behind her back with your coworkers and friends is a completely different thing and has better effects on a relationship. No one likes to listen about someone else’s love stories and romantic life and you shouldn’t talk about this but make sure to tell your friends the things or habits that you like about your spouse. There are pretty good chances that whenever she meets your friends, they will talk about your habits that you always talk about her and good things about her and this will make her feel appreciated.

4.       Appreciate your partner’s good habits:

People say that you shouldn’t make your partner proud of herself or she will think that she is too good for you but that’s not true. A little appreciation is important and must in a relationship. You should talk to your partner and tell her the things that you like about her. The way she looks at you when you walk in the room, the way she waits for you or take care of your when you are sick, are the things that not everyone has in their relationships and if you have these precious little moments in your life, talk about them.

5.       Create an example:

If you find something bad about your partner, you can tell her about her mistakes but there is something else that you could do, don’t make her realize her mistakes but create an example before her and that will make her realize her own mistakes and you will save yourself and your relationship from a lot of trouble. In the same manner, if you want your partner to adopt a new habit or change something about her, start by adopting that habit yourself first and let her see that you are very serious about this.

6.       Spend more time with your partner:

Yes your job is important for both of you but taking a day off in a month won’t do any harm to anyone. This way you can spend more time with your partner and change the boredom in your relationship. It happens that when you always wake up in the morning, go to your office and arrive in the evening for a long time, the relationship starts another level where you both compromise this kind of situation and conditions. Try to change your routines every now and then and take her out to shopping or dinner when you take a day off from work.

7.       Add little excitement in the relationship:

Nothing kills a relationship more badly than adopting a routine and making you used to live a regular life forever. If your partner thinks that you are not romantic or if you think that she is not romantic enough for you, add some kind of competition in your relationship. It can be something like who says “I love you” more than the other or who waits for the other one longer. This will bring some excitement in your relationship and change the way you spend your time together.

Here is another video with good relationship tips